How NOT to be so lame when online dating

It's a week since I've been on Tinder, an online dating app.  I now see why people refer to it as the "hookup" app.

Fast sign up.  Free.  No questionnaire to fill out - many don't even bother with a short bio.  Easy in, easy out.

I've swiped left on literally thousands of profiles.  So easy to pick apart what I don't like.  No tattoos, beards, students, one night stands, threesomes, and on and on.

Then there are the handful that I swipe right on cuz they seem like people I would actually want to hang out with.  Nice looking guys - check.  Have jobs - double check.  Bios are thought out - triple check.  

Then the ball drops.

If we match, I get introductory messages like "Hello" or "Hi".  

Seriously, dude?  You've got nothing better than that?  Not even a "How's your day going?".  LAME, LAME, LAME!!!!  

So I bite and reply back with "Hi!".  But I add in an exclamation mark for extra punch.  ;)  I match what they give me.  Monosyllabic messages only deserve monosyllabic replies.

The next DAY, I get something like "How are you?".  Holy hell, people.  You need to get some game cuz you're one lame duck in a huge pond of other lame duckies.  You'll be lucky if I don't pull out one of my kids' nerf guns and shoot you. 

Why do I bring this up other than you can laugh at me and my dating attempts?

Cuz the lesson of the day, girlz & gentz (if you're a dood & you read these emails, you're a gentleman!), is never, ever forget that the effort you put into something is exactly what you're going to get out. 

Yes, getting pregnant is your trial by fire.  It is difficult and heartbreaking.  You WILL want to give up often.  But it can be a wonderful journey if you use it as an opportunity to become the best expression of yourself that you possible can be.  That can only come if you cultivate the resilience to keep going every month.  Cuz that's what it's going to take.  Giving up should not be an option until you've really reached the end of your fertility journey and for most of you, that isn't even close.

In a few weeks, I'll open registration for my online fertility program.  I have my elves working to get it up and running so don't go anywhere!

Julie Chang,
Natural Fertility Eggspurt

The Real Deal:

  • Natural Fertility Coach
  • Licensed Fertility Acupuncturist for 18 years
  • Master in Traditional Oriental Medicine, Magna Cum Laude
  • B.S. Microbiology & Molecular Genetics, UCLA

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