Mothers not welcome here...

Even if you're not a mother, you've already felt what it's like to be a mother.  

Ohhh, this is gonna burn.

But 'tis the truth I speaketh.

Cuz ALL of us women have been guilty of this at some point.  

Yours untruly is no exception.  So I'm pointing the finger at meself as well.

Can you guess who I'm talking about?  Let me give you a hint...

  • "Don't leave your clothes there.  Can't you pick up after yourself?"
  • "Drive slower", "Turn here/there"
  • "Dishes belong here.  Put the glasses there."

Yes, ladies.  I'm talking about your men. 

We say we don't want to be their mothers.  But dayam, sometimes we sure like to tell him what to do.  If that isn't mothering, I don't know what is.

It's a form of control that's rooted in fear.

It's appropriate for kids cuz we're teaching them how to behave appropriately.  There's a caveat to that though which I'll address in the sidebar below.

Problem is that these "helpful suggestions" show we don't trust or respect our men.  

This can result in men retreating from us, physically AND emotionally.

Sometimes, we treat them like children rather than intelligent and trustworthy adults who have our best interests at heart and want to care for and protect us and our family.

They need to be allowed to do it at their own pace and in their way.

Instead, adopt this mantra “I will not try to teach my man, improve him, or correct him.” and watch what unfolds.

Side bar: If you have boys over the age of 8yo, correcting them in the form of "What do you think about doing it this way, instead of that way?" will show him you respect his growing manhood, giving him the self-confidence he needs.

Enjoy being his woman and not his mother.

Happy un-Mother's Day!  

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Julie Chang,
Natural Fertility Eggspurt
For fertility acupuncture appointments in San Diego, call me at (858) 495-0771 or book here: http://juliechang.genbook.com/

The Real Deal:

  • Licensed Acupuncturist for 18 years
  • Master in Traditional Oriental Medicine, Magna Cum Laude
  • B.S. Microbiology & Molecular Genetics, UCLA

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